Why You Aren’t Getting Better with Women

A presentation at Speed Dating Madrid in in Madrid, Spain by Sam Adams

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While reflecting on my past successes with women and taking down notes for my next guide (which I hope to have finished by next week), I came across something that I thought I’d share early that explains why the vast majority of you aren’t seeing any real progress with the number of women you’re dating and/or sleeping with.

Beautiful Women

What is it? Well, a big part of the reason why I’ve been so successful, was because I had been unknowingly marketing myself to a very specific type of woman. Of course, I’ve been with all types of women, but a huge potion of them were definitely the types of women that I was marketing myself towards.

Why is this such an important point that I had to share early? Take a look at the majority of the seduction marketing and what gurus are using to sell their products and bootcamps. What is a common occurrence? I’ll pause and let you think about it…

Done thinking? Good. Does the phrase “Attract and sleep with beautiful women!” or a variation of it ring a bell? What exactly is a beautiful woman? There’s nothing wrong with a beautiful woman. So the problem? The guys selling these products and bootcamps have planted in your minds too broad of a spectrum of women to target.

The Power of Focus

Continuing, what happens when a person places their efforts on many different subjects? Ever hear of the saying “He’s a jack of all trades, but a master of none?”. And this is exactly what you guys are being taught to do, to be a jack of all trades, but a master of none.

Going back to my past, during grade school, I ended up dating many of the women I REALLY wanted to date, oftentimes being women that I had crushes on. Why is this so? Once I decided that I wanted a woman badly, I studied her, and focused everything I did on winning her over.

Examples of Focus in Action

For instance, I noticed that there was one girl that was really smart and intellectually competitive. And every week, there was this little classroom quiz we had, where the top winners were listed on the board. What did I do? I made sure I beat her every time and rubbed it in her face. What happened? She kept talking to me, and I eventually studied her for other weaknesses, and eventually, I stole her from her boyfriend and took her virginity.

In another instance, I noticed another girl I really wanted would laugh in class everytime I did something retarded. What did I do? I intensified my retardedness, oftentimes getting into trouble. She laughed everytime. Bored, this girl would always sit next to me and wait on me to say something funny. Eventually, we exchanged numbers, I stole her from her boyfriend, and I also took her virginity.

Guys always thought I was some sort of pimp, but really I was no different. The only difference is that they wanted several girls, and thus pulled themselves in different directions trying to attract different girls. Me? I focused on that single girl and catered everything I did to attract that specific woman.

And Now?

I don’t focus on a single girl, but I do focus on a specific group of women. Not wanting to take too much material from this part of my guide, I’ll finish with one example. Look at my body. Toned skinny guy, right? Is it no wonder why I attract so many skinny women?

How does this apply to you?

When a girl flirts with you, you kiss her, get a date, or sleep with her, what happens? You start asking yourself what you did to make that happen. And then? You start focusing your time and energy towards what attracted her to you.

And at a later period in time? A completely different type of woman does the same thing. And what do you do? You start catering yourself to that type of woman, thinking what you did with her is what all women want. And in most instances, you backtrack from the progress you previously made with attracting the previous type of woman.

Do you see where I’m going with this? By just going after “beautiful women”, you are taking yourself in too many directions, thus eliminating your ability to ever be great or even good with ANY of them.

No matter what any guru tells you, ALL WOMEN ARE NOT THE SAME!! They may have general things in common, just like we do, but by no means are they attracted to the same thing. Need proof? Take a look at a random guy walking down the street dressed differently than you and talk to him. Afterwards, ask yourself if you two have very much in common. And that’s my point.

When I happen to sleep with a type of girl that I didn’t necessarily tailor myself to, I don’t start changing my system and what I do. I keep on doing what I do, thus allowing myself to be great at attracting a very SPECIFIC type of woman. Until you decide to focus on a specific type of woman, and not just “beautiful women”, you will never be good with women.

All great men understand this principle. The Power of Focus. Harness it and use it to your advantage.